I am at home now, finally with Adrian.
The nightmare has ended. Alhamdulillah. I know this is test from Allah The Almighty and we took it with patience and looking forward for what’s coming in the future. Although my labor was hard and long and Adrian’s admitted to ward and all, i know this is just a small test from Him. I am thankful Adrian’s is well and fine now. He’s a charm ain’t he!
I’ve been visiting him everyday from 7ish in the morning til late at night ever since the doctor told me i could go home last Sunday the 29th. The day before i was discharged i responded negatively to the iron transfusion, doctors had to cancel doing it and instead taking 2 pines of blood transfusion for 4 straight hours. I was breathless and felt everything inside me is squizzing apart and about to burst, i knew my life could have ended just like that if i kept telling Rif not to call the nurses because i thought i could bare the pain for a while and it’ll be gone in a minute.
Adrian’s IV tube are taken off him slowly by slowly, day by day. I knew he’s feel swollen on his arm, just like me. I have bruises from all the tubes i had. Staying nearby with him next to his cot, cuddled him, fed him, bathed him, settled him makes us bond even closer for this one whole week. It’s not easy being warded separately especially when you’ve just seen him for couple days. This is the experience of my life that i could never forget, ever! I remember everything from pain, to the labor, and to the birth and to the temporary separation that breaks my heart more evenly. Two weeks of pain and happiness. Sitting at the neonatal intensive care unit looking at all the babies makes my heart ache, no other mothers and babies should go through like i had go through. It’s painful seeing your little one in pain but i know this is for his best.
I regret for what i have done to myself and to him during my pregnancy moment. I must have done something so wrong and so bad during those days.
Yesterday marks Adrian’s first car seat ride. He was asleep all the way so it was easy to put him in. Weather outside was hot with 37 degrees.
Welcome home Nyak Adrian Rifdi!
